Robert Palmer Stickley III

Palmer was never one to be impressed by titles, degrees, or accomplishments. He was always far prouder of the achievements of others than his own. Still, his life was one marked by curiosity, intelligence, service, and deep compassion.

Robert Palmer Stickley, III was born in Lynchburg, Virginia, on February 8, 1960, to Evelyn Owens Stickley and Robert Palmer Stickley Jr., both of whom preceded him in death. He graduated from E.C. Glass High School in Lynchburg, attended Hampden-Sydney College, and later earned his master's degree in psychology from the University of Virginia, with additional studies in computer science.

Palmer had cherished memories of his idyllic childhood on Sherwood Place in Lynchburg, Virginia. Stories of adventures with lifelong friends remained some of his favorites to tell, and he stayed close to many of those childhood friends throughout his life. During the summers, he attended Camp Kum-ba-yah and later enjoyed serving as a youth counselor there. He grew up active in the Boy Scouts and was proud to have earned the rank of Eagle Scout.

Palmer was like a big teddy bear. When people speak of Palmer, they almost always mention his smile. It lit up his face and reflected the kindness within him. Friends and family have described him as a gentle soul, a man with a generous heart, and one of the kindest people they have ever known. He had little interest in speaking ill of others and seemed to find the good in everyone he met.

During his high school and college years, Palmer worked as an orderly at Lynchburg General Hospital. He enjoyed the job very much and even considered pursuing pre-med studies at one point. He even considered becoming an Episcopal priest before feeling called to pastoral counseling instead. As life often does, however, it led him in a different direction.

His first job after graduating from UVA came through an opportunity offered by his Uncle Bob Hill, who owned an architectural firm in New Jersey. It was there that Palmer gained valuable experience and built a strong foundation for his future career. Upon his return to Richmond, he worked several jobs before settling into a more defined career path. He later worked for the Commonwealth of Virginia’s Department of Corrections, installing computer systems in state prisons—an experience that provided him with many memorable stories.

Palmer met Jenna in January 1988 at Embassy Suites when he stopped in for lunch with his sister, Elizabeth. He always loved telling the story that Jenna flirted with him that day, though those who knew her understood it was simply her big smile and naturally friendly nature. Nonetheless, it all worked out. Not long afterward, they had their first date. By December 1988, they were engaged. They were married in October 1989, beginning a partnership that would span almost four decades.

In 1996, Palmer supported Jenna as she pursued a career opportunity with Embassy Suites, and together they moved to Jacksonville, Florida. They built a wonderful life there and formed many lifelong friendships. While in Jacksonville, he worked for Jacksonville Electric Authority. In 2001, their beautiful daughter, Kira, was born. Soon afterward, the family returned to Richmond to raise her surrounded by family.

Remarkably, on their very first day back in Richmond, Palmer was offered a position with GuideStar, now known as Candid. What began as a new job became a 20-year career with a company that truly became family to him. Even after retiring in 2020 due to mergers at the new company, he remained close to many colleagues he had met throughout his career. For Palmer, people were always the most important thing. He possessed a deeply analytical, science-driven mind, yet balanced it with extraordinary kindness, empathy, and generosity.

Giving to others was woven into every part of Palmer's life. His career was devoted to nonprofit work. He was a longtime donor of blood and platelets. Even after passing, his spirit of generosity continued through eye donation. It is a profound and beautiful thought that others may now see, thanks to his final gift. There is a particular poignancy in this, as strokes left Palmer largely blind during the last week of his life. To know that someone else may now experience the world through the gift of his sight reflects the very essence of who he was.

Palmer was a storyteller. Though he was often a man of few words, when he spoke, people listened. Sometimes his words carried wisdom; other times they carried one of his infamous dad jokes, much to Kira's amusement—or occasional embarrassment. Either way, his stories left an impression.

Jenna and Palmer returned to Florida in 2019, following their long-held dream of living on the water. In St. Augustine, just as Kira was beginning her time at Flagler College, they found the perfect home—situated on the St. Johns River. It was a place that reflected both their hopes and their willingness to embrace a simpler, more intentional chapter of life. With a combination of courage and spontaneity, they made the decision to relocate almost overnight, leaving caution behind. What followed was a chapter filled with both deep contentment and the unexpected challenges that life would later bring.

After his diagnosis in May 2024, Palmer lived with pancreatic cancer for two years. During that time, he underwent Whipple surgery, chemotherapy, and even entered a trial in early 2026, hoping that he could extend his life. Many would call it a courageous battle, yet Palmer would have wanted it described differently. For him, it was a joy-filled journey. He faced his illness with remarkable grace, gratitude, and peace. He never complained. He rarely expressed anger. Instead, he chose to celebrate the gifts of each day.

His days were spent enjoying simple pleasures: playing Words with Friends, reading, listening to audiobooks, and watching Jeopardy! and other favorite shows, and spending time with those he loved. Just one week before his passing, as he and Jenna settled into bed one evening, he smiled and said, "I love my life."

That simple statement says more about Palmer than anything else ever could.

There was little room in Palmer's life for bitterness. He believed life was about love, kindness, and caring for one another. During the last two years, he often told people that the love we give and receive survives beyond us. He believed that after he was gone, love would remain—and that somehow, we would all continue to feel it. I often felt he was ministering to and comforting others more than we were taking care of him.

One of Palmer’s greatest joys was being in Aruba, especially at Costa Linda Beach Resort on Eagle Beach. More than 30 years ago, he and Jenna fell in love with the island during a spontaneous visit and purchased a timeshare there. For decades, they returned year after year, later sharing that tradition with Kira. It was like a camp for grown-ups, where they returned to staff who had become friends at the resort and connected with families who visited during the same time each year, many of whom became lifelong friends. He was more in his element there than almost anywhere else.

He would rise before sunrise to claim his favorite spot and spend quiet mornings listening to the birds, watching the ocean, and simply appreciating nature's beauty. Only his illness prevented them from returning during the final three years of his life. Surely, he is there now, sitting beneath his beloved palapa in the front row by the aquamarine ocean.

Though he never considered himself a cat person, he willingly embraced life in a household filled with cats because of Jenna and Kira's love for them. Over the last several years, Suki, Marley, Bella, Eli, Bodie, and Gypsy became his companions and faithful friends, often keeping him company during quiet afternoons. At home, nothing made Palmer happier than sitting in his favorite place on the couch, often with a cat on either side, overlooking the St. Johns River. He watched the sunset every evening and never grew tired of its beauty. It was a perfect place for him to spend his final years.

In-home hospice began visiting Palmer during his final six weeks. The nurses, social workers, and chaplain who cared for him became dear companions. Everyone who spoke about their conversations with him said the same thing: he never talked about himself. He cared deeply about everyone else. Each of them told us how Palmer always had a cup of coffee ready and welcomed them warmly into his home, forever the charming host.

Palmer’s final week was difficult and filled with sadness, but until the very end, he remained able to communicate, and we knew he could hear us and understand what was being said. To his very last second, we let him know how much we loved him. During his last days, Palmer was cared for at the Community Hospice Bailey Family Center for Caring. We are so incredibly grateful for the care, respect, and comfort they provided in his final days.

On Tuesday, May 26, 2026, Palmer passed away peacefully and quietly, without a single sound. His passing was as gentle as we could have hoped for. He was surrounded by love, with his daughter, Kira; his wife, Jenna; and a dear friend, Beth by his side.

Palmer was not afraid of dying. What worried him was leaving Jenna and Kira behind. He loved them fiercely and often told others that his family was the most important part of his life.

If you would like to honor Palmer's memory, please consider supporting causes that reflect his lifelong commitment to helping others. Donations may be made to Health Brigade, https://www.healthbrigade.org/ (formerly the Fan Free Clinic), which has served the Richmond community for more than 50 years by providing healthcare to those who might otherwise go without. In light of recent funding challenges, their mission is more important than ever.

The family also encourages support of the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network pancan.org. Pancreatic cancer is a devastating disease that often steals time from families far too quickly. We were blessed to have two years; many only have weeks. We hope future research will lead to earlier discovery, better treatments, and, ultimately, a cure.

Palmer also believed that giving is not only about financial contributions but about sharing of ourselves. As a devoted blood donor himself, he would encourage others to consider donating blood as well. In a poignant twist, he received his first and only blood transfusion during the final week of his life.

Palmer is survived by his loving wife of 37 years, Jenna Stickley; his daughter, Kira Stickley (Dominic George); his sisters, Eleanor Stickley and Elizabeth Stickley Lafoon (Don); his nephews Bert and Neil Kirby; his niece, Eleanor Anne Stumbaugh (Ken), and their daughter, his great-niece Eliza; and his nephew Mason Lafoon, and niece Carter Lafoon (Bryan Eck). He is also survived by his sister-in-law, Terri Moore, and her two girls, Leah Hicks and Georgi Dysert (Scott). He is also survived by his Aunt Eleanor Hill, and many cousins, including second and third cousins who loved him.

We would be remiss not to mention the love and support of countless friends throughout Palmer’s life, especially over the last two years. Among them, Beth Chambers stands out as one of our dearest and most steadfast friends. For more than 30 years, her friendship has been a constant source of joy, comfort, and support. Her love and support during the last two years have been a gift beyond measure. Beth has been present for us in countless ways, offering her time, care, and unwavering presence when we needed it most.

A Celebration of Life for Palmer will be held on Saturday, July 25, at 11:00 a.m. at Orchard House Middle School, 500 North Allen Avenue, Richmond, Virginia.

Palmer would want to be remembered, not for his accomplishments, but for the way he loved. He chose kindness. He chose gratitude. He chose joy. And through the countless lives he touched, that legacy will continue.